The Pursuit of Wellness

The pain is the hardest part. It's so hard, in fact, that you're willing to leverage your dignity and sacrifice everything you stand for. For years I avoided getting the help I needed because I didn't want to face the intolerable pain and illness of withdrawal. I had been abusing cocaine for painkillers for about four years and I knew, first-hand, what happened during one of those unfortunate weeks when I ran out of pills. Every time this happened I began watching the clock, waiting in fearful anticipation for withdrawal to set in. I started getting good at telegraphing the symptoms until they became impossible to know when they were coming. 

The last I wanted to do in life was face detox. After a while I would rather have died than face the pain and illness of getting clean. I tried detoxing on my own about three times before and it always wound up ending the same way: with me on the phone to my dealer, begging for some sense of relief. It wasn't until I entered professional medical detox that I realized there was an alternative to excruciating pain and stomach-turning sickness. For about two years, I languished in addiction limbo, experiencing a series of demoralizing false starts and humiliating relapses. 

Every Time I slipped, I felt a little more of myself slip away. At the end of my rope, I made the decision to seek professional medical detox. At first I was only half-committed because I was convinced that it would end up exactly how it always had. But the more of myself I gave to the process, the more was given to me. Eventually the fear of withdrawal subsided,  because I was able to go through it with the help of helpful and committed doctors and nurses. It was a completely different environment than what I was used to, and that was very appealing to me. Over time, I gained the strength and energy I needed to face withdrawal, head on. 

It really does make a difference where you manage your withdrawal. With the right help and the proper level of support, detox was exponentially easier. It wasn't a walk in the park, but it was a lot easier than facing these symptoms on my own. After completing detox I stayed in my program to complete inpatient rehabilitation. I wanted to do everything I could to ensure never putting myself in such a position again. Every time I feel the urge to start using pills again, I think about how long it took me to get back to sobriety--that's something I never wanted to jeopardize ever again. 


Contact the The National Center for Alcohol and Drug Detox anytime toll-free at (888) 243-3869 or through our online form, for our recommendations of the best medically licensed detox centers for you or your loved one!

Detox should never be attempted in your home or without medical supervision at a licensed detox treatment facility. For your safety we do not recommend any rapid or ultra rapid detox centers.