What Dignity Really Means

Until I went through my crystal meth addiction, I never really bothered to consider the idea of dignity. To me, dignity was always this sort of nebulous, elusive idea that nobody really could really touch or identify. It was only through displaying a complete lack of dignity that I learned the true meaning of the word. I started snorting crystal meth when I was 19 because I was bored—it’s as simple as that. While I am lucky enough to have been physically spared from the worst that this drug can do, there are some moments in my life that will haunt me forever because of the choices I had to make.

There are still times when I wish they could have just reset my brain when I was in treatment; but I also know that remembering the bad times is part of the process and, for me, a very powerful deterrent for relapse. Crystal meth turned me into many things, including an addict, a college drop-out, a sex object and a criminal. It also forced me to see things that weren’t there and physically attack people when they tried to help me. For three years, I abandoned my dignity in nearly every way possible in an effort keep my habit going.

What was most unsettling was that there was never any dramatic scene or explosive incident where it was clear that I needed help; just a series of nauseating incidents that I’d give anything to be able to take back. Eventually all of my friends started dying, getting clean or going to jail. One of them actually wound up in a mental institution after basically killing her brain on a bad batch. My parents pleaded with me to get help after his happened and I was too tired to resist. I entered a Florida drug detox center to get well and reclaim my dignity.

Treatment basically happened in slow motion; like I was being placed in a machine that was meant to restore my reality. Eventually everything came back into focus and it was like someone was snapping me out of hypnosis. As soon as I took a real hard look at myself with a lucid and sober eye, I cried for days. It was like someone was yanking Band-Aid off as hard as they could or, at the risk of sounding dramatic, bringing me into the world all over again. It took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that I allowed myself to get this bad, but my therapist helped-and continues to help-me through it.

So now a little bit more about dignity; it has now come to be my most prized possession and something that I don’t intend to mortgage ever again. 

Contact the The National Center for Alcohol and Drug Detox anytime toll-free at (888) 243-3869 or through our online form, for our recommendations of the best medically licensed detox centers for you or your loved one!

Detox should never be attempted in your home or without medical supervision at a licensed detox treatment facility. For your safety we do not recommend any rapid or ultra rapid detox centers.