Writing My Own Ending

Nobody has a crystal ball, if they did they would never do heroin. Nature plays this cruel and malicious trick on young people by giving them the perceived power of invincibility. Then, when it decides to teach you a lesson about the limitations of the body and the mind, it’s too late for you to even admit you were wrong. After doing heroin for a year and a half, I’ll never understand how some people turn it into a lifestyle. I’ve met people in my NA meeting who had been doing it for years before they quit and one of the first questions I always want to ask them is: “How are you not dead?”

The first time I experienced severe withdrawal from heroin, I was scared out of my mind. I knew exactly what it was and I knew how hard I would have to work to not have to feel this way anymore. I may have known what I had to do, but didn’t do it right away. I just convinced myself that it wasn’t as bad as my body was making it out to be and kept right snorting. I was never able to shake how good that first dose felt and was determined to reach those heights again. This is a feeling that would wind up eluding me, no matter how much heroin I did or how often I did it.

What replaced that euphoric sensation was an endless game of cat-and-mouse between me and withdrawal. I began doing heroin to feel normal and, in the meantime I was losing weight, having awful nightmares and declining steadily into an early grave. My life was completely out of control and I saw absolutely no way out. I began to search for anything and everything to get better and found nothing but an endless gaggle of people that wanted to take my money and blame me for the mess my life had become. It didn’t seem like there was anything I could do.

Professional detox from heroin saved my life. Once I was able to reassert control over my cravings and come back to a more lucid state of mind, I began assess the reality of my situation rationally and, with the help of my therapist, form a plan to stay away from heroin. I left my program two years ago and have been committed to my recovery ever since. Even the saddest of stories can have a happy ending, you just have to be willing to put in the work and trust the right people. 

Contact the The National Center for Alcohol and Drug Detox anytime toll-free at (888) 243-3869 or through our online form, for our recommendations of the best medically licensed detox centers for you or your loved one!

Detox should never be attempted in your home or without medical supervision at a licensed detox treatment facility. For your safety we do not recommend any rapid or ultra rapid detox centers.

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